It's fine. Now-ex, yes. He's been here for some time and he's with someone else. I was fine with it, despite the hurt. I can't blame him. It's the fact we're no longer friends. I have to keep talking myself out of looking at why.
[ That little piece of information staggers her, catches her wrong-footed. In all the various Porter-inflicted weirdnesses she's witnessed, this one hadn't actually occurred to her. ]
Holy shit. I hadn't even thought of that as a possibility that could happen, but I guess of course it could, if people's arrivals are staggered long enough—
That's unlucky as hell. That must be absolutely surreal and incomprehensible to deal with.
[ Cogs turning, that clever Device mind at work: ]
Is this why you were wondering what your past self did, the last time you were here?
It certainly took me back. He's been here for three years? Maybe four. I didn't ask.
Partly. I think I was just curious for the most part. Apparently there is a moon base that my previous self set up.
[ Which begs the question - what time was his last self from? Was it before learning he was psychic? That he didn't lose his magic because Cabeswater was gone? Was it before pulling Opal out of Ronan's dreams? Before Persephone died? He has questions upon questions and not enough answers. ]
There's one thing I'm certain of is that I hurt Ronan -- or well he did. I can't fathom the why and I'm not sure I want to find out. There's others here but we aren't close.
I don't even know how I would deal if that happened to me. Like being betrayed except it's by yourself. Like trying to hunt down traces of a doppelganger, a dybbuk. I've even heard of that moon base; had no idea you ('you'?) were involved in founding it.
You said your previous run here was pretty long, too? Even if you don't remember it?
I'm not sure exactly how long. He ('me'?) was ported out two years ago. Which is frustrating. He's pushing me away for something I have no clue over. I thought we were closer friends but I have no frame of reference. Whatever it was it must have been bad.
It's killing me not to know, but he doesn't want me to know. I'm respecting that but fuck if it isn't hard to not want to reach out to him.
I always want to know everything. Gather all the available information, in order to make the best decisions. Not knowing must be hell.
[ It would be a kind of torture for her, so she can only imagine how Adam's feeling. It's missing something about yourself, some possible glaring faultline that might erupt later. How in the world could you not wonder?? ]
This is a really, really bizarre and uniquely shitty situation for you to be stuck in.
Tell me about it. I just have to hope he'll reach back out one day. I almost messaged him first.
[ There's a break, a moment between messages before he decides to switch gears. He has to or he'll continue to dwell and Adam, for all his wondering and the over-working, knows it's not healthy. ]
I was. Were you? If so, welcome to your first taste of how big public events like swear-ins tend to go around here. Doesn't seem like it was an attack this time, thankfully, but... mayhem nonetheless(!)
I'm worried AtlanTech was able to store the memories for data analysis. It doesn't seem feasible for all of the recordings to just vanish. With what they've shown at the expo, I wouldn't be surprised if they kept them on an internal server system.
I'm not a cat burglar. Maybe more of a Robin Hood in this sense by trying to see if there's more to this than meets the eye. I was going to ask if you could assist in us scrying for the servers but... You want to help us break in?
[ A normal person should probably just say 'no' to this particular invite. Good thing she's not all that normal, then: ]
I broke into a government military base, back home, back in the day. It's probably dumb as hell to say yes, but— I can hardly let my housemate waltz into danger by himself, can I?
You're trying to find proof that they're hanging onto people's memories, right?
(Which, like I said, I wouldn't be surprised one bit. Companies are always selling people's personal data. Who's to say memories aren't the same.)
First we need information. I'm working on digging into online forums, trying to find out anything I can about AtlanTech. Next, we'll be looking into getting blueprints, schematics-- anything that will give us an idea of how their facility is set up. Kenzi is looking into if we can do a public tour of some sort so we can scope out security. Lastly, we'll need to get our hands on some very, very good replicas of employee badges.
You should have seen the last plan I had to come up with. I'm thinking we may be able to locate the server. I'm not sure how accurate it will be. Scrying isn't science, after all. But if it can help, Kenzi can also scry -- we can all try and see what we can find.
Sounds like a good person to have on your side for some magic-assisted B&E.
[ It's probably foolish to do this, it's probably reckless, but. Admittedly, part of her has been hankering for purpose. To do something more important. It's hard to come down from averting apocalypses and saving the world — and then rebel rabble-rousing in an alternate dimension — to a more banal existence, to the day-in and day-out. Anathema might, perhaps, be a little restless. ]
Were you OK? During the swear-in. I know those memories got... a little rough, for some people.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
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[ She's kicking herself. Anathema for the love of god stop saying 'oh'!!! ]
Now-ex?
Wait, you don't have to answer that, if you're not comfortable.
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I was fine with it, despite the hurt. I can't blame him.
It's the fact we're no longer friends.
I have to keep talking myself out of looking at why.
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Holy shit. I hadn't even thought of that as a possibility that could happen, but I guess of course it could, if people's arrivals are staggered long enough—
That's unlucky as hell. That must be absolutely surreal and incomprehensible to deal with.
[ Cogs turning, that clever Device mind at work: ]
Is this why you were wondering what your past self did, the last time you were here?
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Partly. I think I was just curious for the most part. Apparently there is a moon base that my previous self set up.
[ Which begs the question - what time was his last self from? Was it before learning he was psychic? That he didn't lose his magic because Cabeswater was gone? Was it before pulling Opal out of Ronan's dreams? Before Persephone died? He has questions upon questions and not enough answers. ]
There's one thing I'm certain of is that I hurt Ronan -- or well he did. I can't fathom the why and I'm not sure I want to find out.
There's others here but we aren't close.
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You said your previous run here was pretty long, too? Even if you don't remember it?
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Which is frustrating.
He's pushing me away for something I have no clue over.
I thought we were closer friends but I have no frame of reference.
Whatever it was it must have been bad.
It's killing me not to know, but he doesn't want me to know. I'm respecting that but fuck if it isn't hard to not want to reach out to him.
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[ It would be a kind of torture for her, so she can only imagine how Adam's feeling. It's missing something about yourself, some possible glaring faultline that might erupt later. How in the world could you not wonder?? ]
This is a really, really bizarre and uniquely shitty situation for you to be stuck in.
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I just have to hope he'll reach back out one day.
I almost messaged him first.
[ There's a break, a moment between messages before he decides to switch gears. He has to or he'll continue to dwell and Adam, for all his wondering and the over-working, knows it's not healthy. ]
Were you at the swear-in?
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Were you? If so, welcome to your first taste of how big public events like swear-ins tend to go around here. Doesn't seem like it was an attack this time, thankfully, but... mayhem nonetheless(!)
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It doesn't seem feasible for all of the recordings to just vanish.
With what they've shown at the expo, I wouldn't be surprised if they kept them on an internal server system.
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Hm. Good point, now that you mention it.
[ Anathema doesn't trust big for-profit corporations. She should've thought of it herself, honestly, but— she's been distracted. ]
Considering how robust their systems are, backups don't feel out of the question. Ugh.
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[ They've given him no reason to trust, and after what happened... he has to wonder what else they had planned with the technology provided. ]
A friend of mine and I are planning on doing some reconnaissance. Find a way into their facility and see if we can locate their servers.
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You secretly a cat burglar in your free time, Parrish?
[ Without context or tone, that might sound skeptical, dubious. But she's practically perking up her ears, intrigued. ]
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I plead the fifth.
[ But oh he's laughing a little bit. ]
I'm not a cat burglar. Maybe more of a Robin Hood in this sense by trying to see if there's more to this than meets the eye.
I was going to ask if you could assist in us scrying for the servers but...
You want to help us break in?
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Good thing she's not all that normal, then: ]
I broke into a government military base, back home, back in the day. It's probably dumb as hell to say yes, but— I can hardly let my housemate waltz into danger by himself, can I?
You're trying to find proof that they're hanging onto people's memories, right?
(Which, like I said, I wouldn't be surprised one bit. Companies are always selling people's personal data. Who's to say memories aren't the same.)
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I'm a little out of my depth with the whole breaking and entering.
And who's to say they won't keep collecting them?
The possibilities are endless to what they'd need them for.
We should meet with Kenzi, then. I told her I'd reach out but I'm sure she'd like to meet you.
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[ Ah, emotional whiplash. A reminder that he would have reached out to Ronan but he has to look forward and not dwell on a past that's not even his. ]
Who knows what kind of trouble we'll end up getting into. I'm looking forward to it.
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Are you, thWhat's the plan?
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Next, we'll be looking into getting blueprints, schematics-- anything that will give us an idea of how their facility is set up.
Kenzi is looking into if we can do a public tour of some sort so we can scope out security.
Lastly, we'll need to get our hands on some very, very good replicas of employee badges.
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We'll do some scrying, too, maybe see if we can get a glimpse into a good place to approach.
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I'm thinking we may be able to locate the server. I'm not sure how accurate it will be.
Scrying isn't science, after all.
But if it can help, Kenzi can also scry -- we can all try and see what we can find.
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Straight forward. Doesn't beat around the bush. Blunt. Very no-nonsense.
She's one of the first people I met when I arrived.
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[ It's probably foolish to do this, it's probably reckless, but. Admittedly, part of her has been hankering for purpose. To do something more important. It's hard to come down from averting apocalypses and saving the world — and then rebel rabble-rousing in an alternate dimension — to a more banal existence, to the day-in and day-out. Anathema might, perhaps, be a little restless. ]
Were you OK? During the swear-in. I know those memories got... a little rough, for some people.